Ryan and the Blog

I love it when you can easily change leftovers into a whole different dish.

That’s exactly what I did for lunch today. I took the remaining pulled chicken from Tuesday night’s BBQ pulled chicken dish and turned it into buffalo chicken!

Buffalo Chicken Sandwich

I served the buffaloified chicken on a whole wheat sandwich thin, along with cucumber slices, a small cup of honeydew and Colby jack string cheese.

Do the Dew

Refreshing

The Goods

For dessert I had a warm and gooey chocolate chip cookie.

Ooey, Gooey, Chocolate, Chewy

It tasted slightly underbaked which is just how I like ‘em.

Ryan and the Blog

Yesterday afternoon I received an email from Katie with a request for a blog post about how Ryan feels about my blog and how he handles living with someone who snaps photos of food multiple times a day and dedicates hours to creating blog posts.

I must start by saying that I am lucky to have Ryan’s whole-hearted support when it comes to the blog. When I first toyed with the idea of starting my own blog, Ryan encouraged me to go for it and even thought of the name!

Beach Bums

Of course it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. I am a real person and he is someone who lives with a blogging maniac. We have had an argument or two concerning the blog.

Laptop Black Out

Our biggest argument was one I’ll call the “Laptop Black Out.”

Ryan got upset with me because I would type up my dinner post on the couch near him, but with my back against the right arm of the couch and my feet up by his legs. When he looked over at me, all he saw was the front of a big, fat laptop.

That doesn’t exactly scream quality time, now does it?

Solution

I realized he felt neglected when I would spend a lot of time creating a post hunched over my laptop, basically ignoring him. Part of the problem was the time I was spending on my evening posts. My old laptop was unbelievably slow, and I would spend an inordinate amount of time cropping pictures and waiting for things to load. It probably took me 5 – 8 minutes of uploading time per picture. Not fun.

After dealing with this nonsense for a while, I found a great deal online and bought a new laptop. I also discovered Windows Live Writer, a publishing tool that made uploading pictures a breeze. My dinner posts now take about a quarter of the time that they used to and Ryan is a much happier camper. I also try to blog when he is catching up on sports and isn’t looking for one-on-one time.

Ryan always makes me feel like a priority in his life and I needed to do some adjusting to make sure he felt like he was more important than the blog. Lesson learned.

The Pictures

So how does Ryan really feel about me snapping pictures of my food on our dates, or posing with a big ol’ burger on occasion?

I asked him this very question, point blank last night.

His reply? “I don’t really care at all. I’m used to it.”

Whenever I whip out my camera, he calls me his little tourist. ;)

As far as all the pictures are concerned, it also really helps that he’s not easily embarrassed… especially when I’m snapping away in a restaurant or public place.

I think we both feel the most uncomfortable asking other people to take our picture for us, but that made me feel awkward even before I had a blog!

Will You Take Our Picture Please??? Pretty Please??? I'll Give You Candy!

Thank goodness for the self-timer.

The Key

To me, the key to balancing my blog and my relationship with Ryan is recognizing that my blog is my hobby. I do not have the luxury of being a full-time blogger who makes a living solely from my blog. Whenever I feel stress or pressure related to the blog, I remind myself that it is something I do for fun. Of course I want my blog to grow and thrive, but it is mainly my creative release and something that is supposed to bring me joy.

This mentality allows me to not post if I am too busy. It helps me feel okay stepping away from the computer when I’m hanging out with my family and neglect the blog when life gets in the way.

If you struggle with balancing your blog with your personal life, ask yourself this: What’s more important? The world seeing that turkey sandwich you just ate, or cultivating your personal relationships?

Comments

  1. says

    um, option 2 please :) i definitely had to take a step back and try to understand how to balance blogging and my ‘real’ life better. i bumped back to 2 posts a day mon-fri, nothing on saturdays, and only one on sunday. it’s working well so far, but the personal relationships always take precedence!

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    • peanutbutterfingers says

      i also scale back my blog posts a lot on the weekends. i want to be out there LIVING… not just blogging about living. :)

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  2. says

    These are such GREAT tips! I am really fortunate that my husband loves the blog and encourages me taking pictures. But you are right – there is a line that needs to be drawn where you must disconnected from technology and spend time with them!

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  3. kyree90 says

    I have trouble striking balance, too … not so much between the blog and the Boyfriend, because we don’t spend every waking minute together. But I struggle with balancing the blog with the day job and the novel writing … or more honestly, the whole concept of healthy living vs. writing. When I’m in full novelist mode, I don’t want to do anything but sit on my butt and write … cooking, exercising, etc. fall by the wayside.

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  4. says

    Its so great he’s so supportive!! I was afraid my boyfriend wouldn’t be, so I hid my blog for about a month! Once i finally told him, his response was, “well, I was wondering when you were gonna start one, cuz you read them all the time. Now, what is the address?” And now, he checks it every day — and sends me notes of praise and spelling corrections! And like you said, his only condition was: as long as it doesn’t encroach on one-on-one time, its a-okay :)

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  5. Jean@RoastedRootsandPumpkinSpice says

    Thanks for this post! As a new blogger, it’s something I’ve been thinking alot about recently. It realy does help to have people around you who are supportive.

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  6. Angela says

    Very good advice. My hubby gets annoyed when I spend too much time on the computer. That’s when I turn it off and suggest going for a walk.

    I tried to make one of your pumpkin recipes today! So fun!

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  7. Anne @ a daily slice says

    This is so important!! I have totally neglected my blog lately, and am super sad about it, But I’ve been so busy with work that all I have very little time with Hubby at night. I want our relationship to keep thriving so I choose him :)

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  8. says

    Great post!! My husband struggles with feeling neglected sometimes too because of my blog. He says the same thing about me focusing on my laptop all evening instead of him. I too have had to learn to put the darn thing down and dedicate at least an hour each evening to paying attention to him and snuggling. It’s not so bad really! ;-)

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  9. Caitlin says

    I like your philosophy. There are some bloggers who seem to sacrifice their relationships for their blog (of course I have no idea what their lives are really like, this is just the impression I get), and for some reason it really strikes a nerve with me. It’s great that you have found a good balance!

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  10. says

    To answer your question? Totally more inportant for the world to see my turkey sandwich! ;)

    Great post! Hubbs & I have argued once about the blog & the time commitment regarding the lack of financial support it brings. And I had to get some perspective… I’m not a full-time blogger either, so I had to make sure I prioritized and made time for my real job too. And now that I’ve done that, my business is growing at rapid speed! I hate when Hubbs is right! ;)

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  11. says

    This was a really interesting post!! I always worry how my family feels about my constantly taking photos of my food and such (they’re good with it) and you’re really lucky to find someone who is so supportive of you!

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  12. says

    Great post, especially for a newbie blogger like me. My hubby actually is the one reminding to take pic’s because I ALWAYS forget. I am not yet in the habit of talking pictures of what I am doing. That is a super cute outfit by the way! :)

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  13. Chelsea @ Strawberry Sweat says

    I really like this post. My boyfriend and I have been working on this too. I try to blog whenever he is doing other things, but there are sometimes when I have to blog while he is around. He really means more to me than any blog, so when it comes right down to it, he wins everytime!

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  14. says

    I LOVE that Ryan is so supportive about your blogging. Honestly, Craig is kind of…not so much though. He always asks when I’m going to stop with the blogging. But, he LOVES all of the recipes I find on different blogs (including YOUR buffalo pulled chicken that he can’t get enough of :) ) so I remind him of that as well. I also have realized that I don’t HAVE to blog- like you said, it’s supposed to be fun, not an obligation. So, I figure if I don’t have time, or would rather spend it watching a movie with Craig, then that’s what I’ll do!

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  15. says

    Thanks for posting this!!! It’s really great to read about how you and Ryan have found your balance.
    I’m also lucky to have a hubby-to-be who is just as supportive when it comes to my blog. It also helps that his work is an hr’s commute from home, so if I make evening posts, I try to have them done before he is home from work. Although, I’ve found sometimes morning blogging works best for me.

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  16. says

    “What’s more important? The world seeing that turkey sandwich you just ate, or cultivating your personal relationships?”

    That sentence is just one of the reasons why you’re so awesome!

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  17. says

    Again, I’ve got to say how much I love y’alls relationship. As this post testifies, it is SUCH a strong one and so, so admirable. I love the support Ryan gives you and the way you balance everything out. Great tips. :)

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  18. says

    ryan is a really good sport and is always so happy to be on your blog! and the post he did was so cute. marshall is a pretty good sport but it used to be a BIG issue with us. i think it was the time. now that we are married and live together, we see a lot of each other so he doesn’t mind as much!

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  19. says

    What a great way to balance. I have worked hard to find the balance of blogging times so I don’t end up blogging away when Peter is at home. I actually prewrite a lot of my posts and then change up minor things or add in pictures quickly just before posting.

    Life should always be #1 and I love the balance of working on the blog when he’s doing his thing. That’s how we roll too. And the whole posting less on the weekend thing.

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  20. says

    This is hilarious because that’s exactly how I sit on the couch with my husband. He loves it when I blog, though, because he gets to watch whatever sports game he wants–something I can’t sit through when I’m not in front of the computer.

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  21. says

    I love this post. It seems you’ve really know what your priorties are which is fantastic! :)

    Thankfully my blog is a baking blog so people don’t seem to mind when I’m busy baking. Because they get to eat it! haha! :)

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  22. says

    My man came up with the name for my blog too!!

    I totally agree with option #2! Although sometimes I find myself staying up too late just to finish a post! I have to work on that!

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  23. Katie says

    It is definitely healthy to keep blogging and your relationships in a healthy balance. You can’t let blogging take over. I think it’s so refreshing to have Ryan be supportive of your blogging! I have a blog and I feel like if some guy saw me snapping pics of my food he would think I was super weird/super fat. Haha!

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  24. says

    Wow! I could have written the second half of this post myself. My husband is so supportive of my blogging and does all he can to encourage and make blogging easy for me. There has been a few tiffs involving the blog, but we’ve learned how to get around them, including me writing all I can of a post earlier in the day when I have free time and just adding dinner in after we eat–this leaves so much more time available for us to spend together.

    WLW is the biggest help of all, though!

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  25. says

    I bet it can be hard to run a successful blog and not make Ryan feel alienated by the whole thing.

    I am happy to hear things like this (you guys have fought over it) because it makes the rest of us feel slightly better.. as bad as that sounds, you know what I mean!

    I like those gold sandals, BTW.

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  26. says

    My husband sometimes does get neglected because I am blogging. He is more important than seeing a sandwich, you’re right. I just need to remember that too.

    Although, he does like it when I take pictures of his food too.

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  27. says

    My BF sometimes thinks it’s weird that I take pictures of my food…I used to try and do it in secret, because he doesn’t read my blog…but I feel weird keeping things from him. I think he thinks it’s strange that I want to share this part of myself with strangers…But I’m okay with it because I feel like this blog community is INCREDIBLY supportive…I’m never afraid to say thing on my blog…

    He’s getting better about my picture taking/blogging. I think he’s finally realized that I’m not going to stop any time soon….he also likes it when I include him…

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  28. sophie says

    hey julie!! love your blog :) but just a little advice, i think maybe you should change the line in “the key” section of this that says you arent a full time blogger. hope you have a nice day.

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  29. says

    Ah, so happy I came across this! I’ve been feeling like I’ve been neglecting my boyfriend lately because of my blogging obsession… I have to consciously try and do it when he’s not around now so he doesn’t feel replaced by my computer. He would never say anything but I know sometimes it bothers him. Yay for amazing supportive significant others! :)

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  30. Kate says

    Hi Juley – I’m not sure if you’ve mentioned this somewhere or not, but I’ve been looking through your blogging section and haven’t found an answer.
    About how long per day/week do you spend working on the blog? (Including answering emails, setting up giveaways, writing posts, etc.?) Thanks!

    I absolutely adore your blog and look forward to reading it everyday! It’s a great study break.

    Kate

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  31. says

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    to argue with you (not that I really will need to…HaHa).
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