I was off to the social security office this morning to officially change my name from Julie Bream to Julie Fagan. Well, Julie Elizabeth Bream Fagan. Only eight months after we got married! I’m quite punctual.
It’s hard to believe that I’m now Julie E. B. Fagan. The E.B. cracks me up. I feel like the author of Charlotte’s Web.
I considered dropping “Elizabeth” but I just couldn’t ditch the middle name I’ve had my whole life and I wasn’t about to drop “Bream.” The woman at the social security office told me that middle names don’t mean much anyway, so I decided to keep it and have two middle names.
Ryan and my dad got a pretty good kick out of my new name when I called them and said they were now speaking to Julie E. B. Fagan. Maybe I should’ve combined Elizabeth and Bream… Elizaream? Breamabeth?
I think I’ve put off changing my name for so long because I wanted to feel 100 percent comfortable changing my name. I always knew I’d take Ryan’s last name, but no longer being Julie Bream was difficult for me to wrap my head around at first. I absolutely adore my family and love being connected to them. Of course our connection is deeper than sharing a last name and I really wanted to be connected to Ryan (and our future children) in that way, but it wasn’t a simple decision.
But now it’s official and I’m excited! I just have to wait for my new social security card to come in the mail and then head to the DMV (joy!) to get a new driver’s license.
Lunch
Lunch today was inspired by my meal from the Virgin Olive Market a couple of weeks ago.
I placed fresh mozzarella cheese on a sweet wheat Alternative Bagel and toasted it before topping the bagel with tomatoes and fresh spinach.
Strawberry banana Chobani Greek yogurt and fresh blueberries were served on the side of my bagelwich.
I am loving that all summer berries are on serious sale lately! They’re the candy of summer!
Question of the Afternoon
- Did you/Would you change your last name after marriage?
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This is pretty common in the South I think, but when I got married I took my husbands last name and dropped my middle name. I was Ashley Nicole H and now I’m Ashley H Bennett
I wasn’t particularly attached to my middle name but I’m very attached to my maiden name so I made sure to keep it 🙂
Did you have to legally change your name to replace your middle name with your maiden name? I wanted to do that but the woman at the county clerks office told me that was a legal name change.
Hi Melissa
When I went to the Social Security office to change my name (to reflect my married name) they let me do it there. It was all one transaction.
Thanks Ashley! I guess I will just have to go and see what happens.
I considered your approach for a second….then I changed my mind when I realized mine would become E.T. hahaha.
Congrats on taking that last big step into married life! 🙂
When I get married I do intend on changing my last name. I Hahaha.. I would then be considered a General Manager I suppose.. since I will be Caitlin G. M. ____ Nice! I never thought of that!
I had a really hard time changing my name. My maiden name is french and unusual (read – difficult for anyone to pronounce, like my first name) and my married name is very vanilla. So I did the same thing you did, I have two middle names. It is a squeeze on the drivers license and on airline tickets, but I make it work. It was important for me to keep all of my names!
I plan to, but will wait until after the honeymoon since we’re travelling to Europe and it could complicate things!
I would have such a hard time changing my last name. Rebeka Ann Osborne is so good. My husband would have to have a really good last name for me to consider changing it. I just don’t know. I totally understand your hesitance in making the jump. I’m glad you decided on two middle names too. I like it.
My initials really are “EB.” hahaha. I consider Eggland’s Best eggs to be made just for me. 🙂
I did change my name but I never changed my bank account to my new name!! I always tell the cashiers that notice (not that many do) that I just got married. . .even though it was February 2008!!! Whoops!!
Hmm, you know I never really thought about it very much, but I think I would take my husband;s last name. I’m not sure if keeping my last name in there as well would be odd, since mine is rather long… it’d be a mouthful!
Two of my fav things right there- bagelwiches and Greek yogurt+blueberries! Could eat both daily!
I did the exact same thing. I refused to drop my maiden name, and I considered hyphenating but I would have had a 7 syllable last name, and it NEVER would have fit on any forms! The lady at the SS office was like “are you sure you want to do this? Are you positive? Because if you change your mind, you have to go to court to change it back!” LOL!
So now when I initial things, it’s SLGW. I like it.
http://www.learnvest.com/living-frugally/psychology-of-money/keep-your-maiden-name-earn-500000-more-792/
Check out this article about name changing. Sort of interesting. I did the same thing you did, adding my husband’s name to the end and keeping my maiden name. It is a pain to fill out government forms and I always get asked about the “two last names” when I fly. It gets a little old explaining, but it’s not really a big deal.
My last name is Cox, so, uhm…yeah. As hard as it will be I’m probably gonna give that one up 😉
I love the E.B. – LOL!
I changed my name for my first marriage, but after that ended, I was so elated to take my own name back. When I married my current husband (best, last, forever-and-ever husband), I really thought about it hard.
I eventually decided I wanted to keep my name, not just as a part of a longer name that added his, but just MY name. I found out I needn’t have stewed — husband was perfectly blase about it. He said he hadn’t really even thought about it and never quite understood that uniquely Western custom anyway.
My neighbors just assume and call me “Mrs. Husband”, though. I have no problem, I answer! I think it’s kind of sweet. And the mailman (who sees both our names) and the vet’s office (where our pets are always under my name) probably just think we’re living in sin. 🙂
I feel like such a rebel – ha.
I plan on changing it although I’m not a fan of my fiance’s last name. It’s just not a pretty sounding name.
A friend of mine used this site when she changed her last name (http://www.missnowmrs.com/default.aspx). It was $30 but was supposedly pretty easy to use.
I will for sure change my last name, but I like the idea of keeping my maiden name as well. I am actually have two last names already bc I am adopted. So if I got married to my boyfriend my full name would be
Nicole Marie Hopkins Gomez Hartsell
hahaha maybe I should shorten it??? Wow.
I tried to change my name to have two middle names (my original middle name and my maiden name) but SSA said that I was only allowed to change my last name. So I could take my husbands name or I could have two last names. I didn’t want two last names because my husband already has two last names and it’s complicated enough, so I ended up having to drop my maiden name completely. I was a bit sad. I’m surprised you were allowed to do that – they told me the only way I could change my middle name was to go to court.
I’m doing the same thing! Two middle names. I was concerned because I had heard in my state (NY) that that isn’t an option on the marriage license, and it was actually on my to do list for this afternoon to call social security and confirm that I can do this! Thanks for the push!
What did SS say? Two middle names or two last names?
When I got married last year I went through the same thing. I went back and forth between losing my maiden name or keeping it as my second middle name. In the end, I decided I’d drop it. It was a tough decision but in the end I didn’t want four names 🙂 (and the DMV was SO much less annoying than the SS office, so you have the hard part done with for sure!)
I was just married on June 11th and plan to hit up the Social Security office tomorrow bright and early. I hope the fact that the office is in a small town (surrounded by more small counties) that I can get in and out. I dropped my middle name of Louise and will now be Julia Eckman Gray. I always thought I would be happy to be free of my last name until the time came to fill out that marriage license when I couldn’t bear the thought of being seperated from my name of 30 years.
I’ll definitely change my name (hope it’s a good one!) but totally see how it will be difficult to actually do. Congrats E.B!
Oh yea. I got married back in October and have really slacked off on this. Oh did I mention it was October in 2008, not 2010? OMG. I am horrible. I have been waiting like you because I wanted to be sure it was the right decision – ie drop it completely, take my maiden name as middle name, hyphenate, etc. I have waited because my new name is harder to pronounce and my father passed away a year ago so it’s really hard to give up my ‘family’ now especially.
I hope to have my decision made by our anniversary this year, since it’ll be our 3rd! Luckily my husband is patient:)
That pic of Charlotte’s Web really made me smile, that’s the edition I had as a kid 🙂
I just changed my name last week!! I did the exact same thing you did because I loved my initials so very much I didn’t want to lose them! So I went from J.A.M. to J.A.M.S.!!!! I think the S at the end makes it even more awesome!!
I think making the decision in 8 months is very timely. It was 5 years before I altered my name. I didn’t want to lose my last name and it wasn’t a big deal to my husband, so I didn’t change a thing until I became pregnant.
My husband and I discussed it and decided that we would both hyphenate our names and our daughter would have a hyphenated last name as well. She might resent us for it, but she can just put it on the list of things we’ve done wrong :). I definitely wanted to have the same last name as my child, but never could feel comfortable taking my husband’s name. He has become as much a part of my family as I am of his, so I think it’s only fair. I’m so glad he was open to the idea!
I find this to be such an interesting concept. I am dating someone, but not engaged/married and my whole life I have DREAMED of getting married and being Mrs. So and So! It is funny to see the variation on here! Also, my last name ends here… so reading this conversation, I’m kind of sad to think that I may change my last name one day! I think I’ll do the 2 middle names 🙂
Also, I have been seeing a lot of hyphenated last names lately!
i kept all of my names two, but I have two last names. no hypen. just two separate names.
Yay Congrats!!
I did change my name. My maiden name is Greek and I was SO ready to go by something easy – so it was a no brainer 🙂 I didn’t keep my maiden name b/c I LOVE my middle name (Erin) and I didn’t want my initials to be MELW. Silly, but it was perfectly logical at the time!
I wouldn’t change my name at this point. I am older than you – late 30s – and I have worked hard to establish a professional reputation which is totally connected to my name. If I was in a different profession, then I’d absolutely change my name. However, if I had kids I would want the same last name as them….so I’d reconsider if that happened.
I always thought I would end up just taking my husband’s last name, but now I’m not sure I would want to totally get rid of mine…maybe I would do two last names…
I got married last Oct. and finally changed mine last month. I was the same as you, I felt like I didn’t want to change it because I was connected to my family and the name I already had. It meant alot to my husband to change it though so I finally did it and dropped my maiden name and took his 🙂
Congrats on the change! I’m pretty sure I’ll be changing my last name when I get married. I’m not too into the whole hyphenation thing, and I’m not overly attached to my last name so it doesn’t seem like that big of a deal for me. Unless of course, it happens to rhyme with Angela.. then I might have to think of some other options – or another man!! 😛
I always just assumed I would change my name when I got married and I never really considered not doing it. But giving my up my very awesome Italian last name was tough and some days I still miss it!! Also, my married name is Doody. Yep, Doody. Imagine the jokes I get????
When I got married, I changed my last name. I also loved my middle name. I just dropped my maiden name and kept my middle name.
My boyfriend and I were JUST talking about this yesterday. We plan on getting married in about two years, and he is a bigger feminist than I am (he’s getting his PhD. in Sociology. It’s like his job to be a feminist–haha!). He really doesn’t see any reason for me to change my name, and actually prefers that I don’t. I, on the other hand, like the idea of having the same name as my husband (and eventual children), but would find it awfully hard to give up the name I’ve had my entire life. Decisions, decisions!
Right now, my first name is French (mom’s heritage) and my last name is Irish (my dad’s). My boyfriend’s last name is French, so we always joke how if we got married my name might actually make cultural sense lol
BUT, jokes aside, I love the idea of taking my future husband’s name, but at the same time I’d miss the name I’ve been called entire life up to that point (and it’s a pretty good one too 😉 )
I changed my name 2 days after getting back from my honeymoon, I was so darn excited and I love sharing it with my husband!
The alternative bagel deal is such a great idea! Looks like a very tasty sandwich.
As for last names, my mom never changed hers and I’m 90% certain I will continue the tradition of keeping my own last name. I’m thinking maybe I would take my future husband’s last name as a second middle name and maybe he would do the same. Maybe not the typical thing to do, but I think it makes sense. We’d share a bit of each other then! 🙂
I love your new name and the fact that you preserved your maiden name as part of it!
When / if I get married, I plan to add my boyfriend’s last name to my existing name. And… wait for it… I may add my Mom’s maiden name to my name, so I’m Laura Rose (middle name) Menard (Mom’s maiden name) Mueller (my maiden name) – Husz (boyfriend’s last name). But then I wouldn’t include my middle initials within my signature, so it’d just be LMH. I’ve put lots of thought into this 🙂
I love that you referred to fruit as summer candy 🙂 I love that! I love those sales just as much! I stock up so I can have piles of fresh + bags of frozen for smoothies 🙂
Ps. We must have gotten married around the same time! I’m an “8 monther” as well 🙂
I plan to change mine. I have a last name that literally no one pronounces correctly, and luckily my boyfriend has a very common last name so I’m looking forward to people not butching my name everywhere I go. But, I know plenty of ladies that have kept their maiden name and I say GO THEM! My friend decided to keep hers and give her child her last name as well as her husbands.
congrats! I just changed mine last week 🙂
I think you can actually go to MVA 48 hours after SSA – that’s what they told me because I had waited for new card to come but they didn’t even use that or ask for it – it just needed to be changed in the system.
I kept my middle name because I was really attached to it but ditched my old last name. I def agree with you that it’s bittersweet! My maiden name was SUPER long so it wouldn’t have worked to hyphenate or have two middle names.
I think I would change my last name, but I understand your hesitations. I am really close to my family and it will be hard changing it (but exciting too).
I dropped my maiden name and just kept my middle name. My maiden name was so long and hard to pronounce! I also gave my daughter my middle name as her middle as well.
I’m definitely keeping my name. Not because of my dad or family, but because of ME. It’s who I’ve been for almost 30 years.
My sister kept both her middle and her maiden name as well, when she got married. Now she’s a four-namer as well. I’m torn for whenever I end up getting married because well, I’ll just come out and say it. My middle name is Ho. Yup, Gretchen Ho Powell, much to the delight of pretty much any boy that has ever found that out.
So, while I am super proud of my half-Chineseness and the fact that my mom decided to bestow HER maiden name upon me as my middle-nomer, I’m just not sure…
Yay for the name change. I got married this year also and TRIED my best to do the name change thingy right away! What a PAIN in the you know what! I had a little bit of a hard time parting with my name (although I pushed my maiden name to my middle name as well) because I’m so close to my family, too, but I love my hubby and wanted to stay traditional. I still have a couple things to tie up as a newlywed. There is an amazing newlywed checklist on The Nest.com which I refer to a lot! Love that website!
I’d like to have the same last name as my husband if I ever get married, but I kind of like my last name! The verdict is still out 🙂
I am getting married on August 6 and had already decided to change my name, (Courtney Dawn Gillies to Courtney Dawn Mihalicz) but also don’t want to part with Gillies. I hadn’t even thought of adding it to my middle name. Courtney Dawn Gillies Mihalicz sounds perfect to me!! Thanks for the great idea!
Always a heated discussion, I will not change my name. I have two professional degrees and am published with my name. If I ever get married my husband will just need to understand that. I would pose the question of would you change yours?