We’re hoping to spend 99 percent of our time outside, hiking with Chase and Sadie (wish us luck because we bought a new hiking backpack to try) and playing in the pool and lake near our townhouse rental. I’ll be sure to share a recap of our first vacation away as a family of four (Sadie always counts!) on Monday.
Until then, I wanted to stop by to share my weekly Things I’m Loving Friday blog post with you guys and, as always, encourage you to participate in the fun by sharing a little bit about what is making you smile in the comments section of this post!
Have a great weekend!
Things I’m Loving Friday
A recap of Alyssa and Brittany’s visit last weekend never made it on the blog earlier this week, but it was so nice to have friends in town when Ryan and I were in serious need of a good distraction last weekend. Alyssa and Brittany arrived in town on Friday night and we filled the weekend with time on the lake and lots of yummy food and drinks (Brittany made a s’mores dip that was amazing and her strawberry frosé was the perfect summertime beverage). I’m grateful for the internet for bringing these two wonderful women into my life and we had a blast getting to know their guys better, too! We’re already talking about planning another visit soon! Thanks for making the drive to Charlotte, Brittany and Alyssa!
There’s something special about nut butter you discover at a local farmer’s market and I can absolutely see why Brittany and Alyssa fell in love with Reginald’s Nut Butter at their local Richmond farmer’s market. It’s made with delicious roasted Virginia peanuts, a dash of oil and, depending on the unique flavor, a small handful of other natural ingredients. Brittany and Alyssa brought me their two favorite flavors – Nana Honey Peanut Butter and Wedding Pretzel Crunch – and I can absolutely see why Reginald’s is a staple in their houses. I’ve mostly just been eating it straight out of the jar (still my favorite way to enjoy peanut butter), but it was also amazing drizzled on top of a hot bowl of oats for breakfast yesterday. Yum!
Is it just me or are people completely brow obsessed these days? What is it with eyebrows right now!? Truthfully, I’ve never really given my brows much thought and apparently it shows because I had someone send me a message on Snapchat recommending that I fill in my brows a bit since they are so light. It’s something that’s been on my radar for a while now but eyebrow pencils scare me and after a bad experience with a makeup artist years ago, I was super weary of overly bold eyebrows.
As fate would have it, I ended up stumbling upon an eyebrow station at Ulta a few weeks ago and took some time to experiment with a few different products. I ended up walking away Benefit’s Ka-Brow! Cream Gel Eyebrow Color. The brush allows for buildable color which is perfect for me since I can lightly layer it on until my brows start to appear more defined (and not too crazy-bold!) and fill in some of the splotchy parts of my brows. It has awesome reviews on Ulta.com and I’ve been very happy with this random find!
Last month, when I got my hair done, at the end of my appointment, my hairstylist rubbed a bit of Moroccan oil on the ends of my hair. Now that I’ve started coloring my hair, I cannot help but ask a million questions about hair care since I know coloring can damage the hair and I want to keep my hair as healthy as possible. When I asked about the benefits of Moroccan oil, my hair stylist explained that it’s great for conditioning the hair, decreasing breakage and adding shine without residue.
Years ago, during a Fitness Magazine event, I received a sample of Moroccan oil and used it for a little while before I completely forgot about it. Thankfully, my latest experience at the hair salon reminded me of my old bottle and I found it in the back of a drawer in my bathroom. I’ve been applying it to my hair (avoiding the roots) before bed and love the way my hair soaks it up overnight so it doesn’t look greasy in the morning. Anything to keep my hair healthy!
- The Honest Company Overnight Diapers
I’m sure you guys know by now that I am a big fan of The Honest Company’s diapers. I’ve been subscribing to their diaper bundles for months (<—a great way to save money if you’re also a fan of their diapers!) and recently added a pack of overnight diapers to my order. They are wonderful!! Even when Chase wakes up to nurse in the middle of the night, I try not to change him (unless, on the off chance, there is a number two in there…) and the overnight diapers definitely seem to hold more in and keep Chase dryer for longer. Plus, the sleepy sheep print is too darn cute! The overnight diapers are now a bedtime staple in our house!
- Constructive Feedback and Some Final Thoughts
This week I received some similar comments from a handful of blog readers who were frustrated with the vague way I approached sharing our stress surrounding Chase’s blood work on the blog. I have thought a lot about these comments and I completely understand where they are coming from and wanted to address these concerns here this morning.
One blog reader left the following comment on Wednesday’s blog post:
“I hope you will elaborate on the story more soon, as I feel your vagueness is allowing readers to form their own opinions that this isn’t that serious. I don’t think that was your intent, but that is the way it is coming off. This seemed like more of a scare and pale in comparison to what other parents may be going through. Again, because of the vagueness. My advice as a reader is full transparency or none at all.”
Truthfully, I think her comment sums up the way a handful of you may feel right now and so I wanted to share my response to her constructive feedback with you below. I am always, always learning and know that I make a billion mistakes as a blogger but I appreciate those of you who left constructive feedback and want you to know I take it to heart.
My response:
“Thank you for your feedback. I can understand where you are coming from and apologize if my vagueness is upsetting to you and others. As a blogger, I sometimes struggle with what to share and what not to share in such a public space. At the time I initially shared what we were going through, I had no idea what the end results from Chase’s blood work would be. I hoped and prayed and believed they would be good, but I didn’t know. And I was scared.
As I briefly mentioned before, the follow up blood work we had done was not directly related to Chase’s small size but something more serious that truly frightened me and my family. When a mother hears the words ‘bone disease’ mentioned by her child’s doctor it is hard not to worry, cry and feel helpless. I didn’t feel comfortable not mentioning my worries on the blog and pretending like things were happy and fine when the past week has been filled with a lot of stress and uncertainty while we waited for results from his follow up blood work.
I realize that receiving good news now may make this whole ordeal seem small, but when I shared what we were going through, I didn’t know what the results were going to be and I was scared and unsure how to handle everything. We are feeling optimistic, but still have some follow up testing in our future. I am believing all will be okay.
In retrospect, maybe I should’ve kept this off the blog altogether. It was a struggle for me because not mentioning something that directly impacts the biggest thing in my life – my son – felt fake, inauthentic and disingenuous. I didn’t know how to handle it and maybe I didn’t handle it well, but I hope you can understand where I’m coming from and that it was not at ALL my intent to make others feel bad or bring about comparisons to other family’s health concerns. I think you’re right about full transparency or none at all in the future. It’s something I spoke at length with Ryan about yesterday and I know that in the future, I will likely keep things like this to myself. Thank you for reading and for your feedback. I truly appreciate it.”
I am sharing my response with you today because while I think sharing highs and lows on this blog is important, I know that some things truly are better off discussed outside of such a public space. I now know my son’s health is one of these things.
Your comments are not dissuading me from being authentic in this space but there are certain things that affect me and my family that I am learning should not be shared so openly. I apologize to those who were upset by the way I handled everything and, more importantly, I apologize to those facing health scares within their families who were upset by my posts. I truly, truly wish only the very best for all of you.
- Friday Flashbacks
10 Make Ahead Breakfast Recipes (A roundup of 10 of my favorite breakfast recipes that can easily be prepped ahead of time.)
Total Body Pyramid Workout (Begin by completing 20 reps of the five exercises listed in the 20 reps section before moving onto 40 reps of the four exercises in the 40 reps section and 60 reps of the final three exercises in the 60 reps section. Then go back down the pyramid and complete the 60, 40 and 20 rep sections in reverse order.)
- Around the Web
Food: Spinach Banana Muffins // Healthy Mexican Shrimp Salad // Watermelon Rosemary Popsicles
Fitness: 12 Minute Tabata Workout // Do What Made You Happy As A Kid // Yoga Flow for Digestive Health and Relaxation
Question of the Day
- What is one thing you are loving this week?
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That nut butter looks amazing!!!
PS – negative people are just jealous 🙂
Oh, i feel so sad about the comment you received. I appreciate that you admit to issues as a mother even if vague. As a new mum i daily feel like i fail at things and am guilty of fretting! It makes me feel more normal to hear the truth… even if its not the whole story i still find comfort from it. You had sleep trouble with Chase and i found that helpful as we went through the same and i was so worried about it. I found your posts helpful and made me feel less alone.All us mums in the same boat 🙂 but i understand your decision.x
Julie, I don’t think you should have to explain yourself! I’m sorry that people are making you feel bad about your decision to share what you shared. I look forward to reading your blog every day <3 thanks for being authentic and real!!
I live two hours north of Snowshoe and visit there frequently! Definitely eat at Foxfire in the village and spend some time in the shops. It’s even more beautiful and charming in the winter!
We cannot wait to explore this morning! Thanks for the recommendation, Molly!
I love when you share personal stuff even though I’m sure it’s hard to receive such feedback- but hearing about the tough things in your life makes you seem more real and relatable!
I’m glad your baby boy is ok. Enjoy your weekend!
Hi Julie, this is your space, and your life, only you should decide what you want to share or not, you do not “owe” your readers anything, I am glad you felt you could share because it must have been very stressful for you, I don’t think parents should try and “balance” worries as if some worries were more legitimate than others, all parents worry and all concerns are valid in the eyes of the person who does the worrying. Love reading your blog and hearing updates of your lovely little family, have a great week-end! Anne Sophie
I agree with the other commenters this morning that this is your blog and your choice! If people aren’t interested or don’t agree with what you’re posting, then why are they still reading and posting their opinions? Clearly people are interested in what you write and you shouldn’t feel like you need to share anything about your family or life that you don’t want to. You’re incredibly open with your readers. People are just whiners.
Julie: While I accept that everyone has their opinions, not everyone shares that readers opinion. It is your Blog and you share what you wish with ANY topic. We can chose to read it or not, but I feel (IMHO) that we don’t have the right to tell you to share more or less of anything,
I don’t feel it was deceptive as you stated enough ( waiting on tests) and you were scared shitless. What else was there to say? I saw you had about 300 people praying for you and you and your family and why wouldn’t you want that?
As a blogger you aren’t going to please everyone. Do what is right for you, It seems you got great comfort from your readers ( And there is a whole lot of experience out here to tap into) so share what you need and just know you can’t please everyone.
My two cents.
The way you handled it made sense and to me, it came off as you sharing some insight into your life completely voluntarily while still maintaining the sense of privacy you deserve. As someone who lost a very young family member after 8 years of battling unknowns, our family began to understand why vagueness was important for his parents until full details came back (good, bad or indifferent – though usually bad). Though I understand the full transparency or none at all, I mostly understand it for sponsored posts, which this was far from. Your personal life doesn’t need to be exploited on here every time something comes up… Yet you’ve always provided readers with a nice balance. I believe that how you’ve always handled things, vague or not, has worked for the majority of us readers who have been reading for years.
You do you and know that most of us will always still be here regardless! You put so much into this blog and it is such a highlight for so many of our days. Thank you for that!
PS – so glad you guys got the results you wanted and that Chase is ok. At the end of the day, he’s the most important 🙂
I don’t normally comment, but I had to comment today! Please don’t feel like the way you shared private info about your child’s health was a blogger mistake! You get to set your own boundaries, and your stress and Chase’s health are more important than the feelings of readers! I totally respect your stance of keeping Chase’s health off the blog in the future, but I don’t think you owe anyone 100% transparency. That’s an unreasonable bar for a public space. I thought the way you handled it was commendable-real and honest while respecting your family’s privacy. Thanks for blogging; it’s one of my favorite things to check in the morning.
i never ever comment (long time reader and supporter thought!) but that comment you received really bothered me. its absolutely none of their freaken business. this is your blog, your space and frankly your child and you dont owe anyone, anything. as a reader and supporter the only thing we are entitled to, is to what you choose to share! and just because some parents might be going through something more difficult it does not take away the stress/validity of your issue! that commenter/anyone else that feels that way really needs to take a step back.
I’m so sorry you received that negative comment! One of the reasons I’ve enjoyed reading your blog for years is that you are so authentic and genuine – with your opinions, adventures and life. I feel that you trust us as readers and so I trust you – whether it’s about a recipe to try or a product you like or a place to visit. Please don’t let the negative people get to you – just keep on being you!?
I can’t believe someone left that comment. Please do not feel like you have to apologize for your own blog. Just know there are many more of us who all support you and dont demand “a one way or another” about your personal life just to please the reader.
Have a wonderful vacation with your beautiful family!
I am sorry that some people cannot respect your privacy. As a reader, I have always enjoyed you sharing the ups and downs, even if I don’t know the full story. I hope everything will be okay with your son’s health.
I am someone who reads but does not often comment on blogs. I felt the need to comment today, though. Comments about you being “vague” were completely unnecessary. It often seems like people are “damned if they do and damned if they don’t.” If you did not share struggles with motherhood and life in general, people would criticize you for being all sunshine and rainbows. If you do share, you are seen as “complaining” or not giving enough information. It is always your choice in what to share and if people are offended or annoyed, that is their problem and they can click the X in the corner. It was clearly a very difficult time for your family and the thought that someone added stress to your situation is maddening.
I think you handled the situation the best that you could, and in a time of worry, hundreds of prayers and positive thoughts from blog readers could only help.
Thank you, Emily! The “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” thing definitely rings true as a blogger. I do understand how limited information can be frustrating though and while I plan to continue to share highs and lows, I think there are some things I just don’t have thick enough skin to handle opinions, frustrations, anger, etc. about and family/health concerns are one of those things. This was definitely a learning experience for me and I am so, so appreciative of the kindness and prayers we received this past week. <3
It makes me so sad that people commented about your post being vague. You clearly stated that you would give more details and even said when you would do so. This is your blog and we as readers are not “owed” anything from you.
Also, please do not let anyone try to minimize what you were going through at the time. I admire your classiness in handling this situation and also your honesty. Enjoy your weekend getaway!
Hey Julie!
I read this blog everyday, but never comment. Today I had to. This is YOUR space, YOUR blog, YOUR story. People choose to read, or not to read. Just keep doing what you are doing- because it’s something great. If you want to share half the story- so be it! It’s not for us to judge as we sit at our desks, on our couches, at our kitchen tables reading about YOUR life. Keep bringing it!
I just want to say that I don’t see anything wrong with the way you handled sharing what you and your family were going through. You were very clear from the beginning that you felt you would get good news although you still felt scared of the possibility of anything else.
I would liken this to someone saying you can’t talk about your healthy baby and all the things you enjoy doing because other children have health problems. Or not sharing your birth story because other women are trying to conceive and haven’t yet.
So I just wanted to say I’m sorry that those comments added another level of stress to an already difficult situation. I hope your family enjoys a nice get away in WV!!
Pretzel PB? YUM! PS – have you been to the Davidson Farmer’s Market? It’s been on my list but I feel like every Saturday something else comes up. I’m so glad to hear Chase’s results were positive – I personally feel that you can disclose whatever you want to whatever extent you want. While transparency is something readers want, we aren’t privileged to know every single detail of your life. These are personal matters. Again, so happy to hear the results were good, and have so much fun this weekend!
I am sad for you that someone would even leave such a comment. I think people tend to forget that your blog (and others) are the authors blog and no one else’s. You should be able to post whatever you want, vague or not, and have to answer to no one. I hope you do continue to post personal issues as they come up because they make you more relate able and may even help others that end up in similar situations. Given that you receive ugly comments, I totally understand if you don’t but I hope you always remember that this space is yours and us as readers have the choice to read or not to read and should never criticize. I prayed for your sweet boy when I read the post, it brought tears to my eyes. Having a little guy myself, I can’t imagine waiting on possibly devastating results. Enjoy your family trip!!
I also just wanted to echo what others have been saying. This is your blog- you shouldn’t have to explain yourself, although you did so very graciously. If people don’t like certain aspects of content, they don’t have to read it! You have NO obligation to provide either full and complete disclosure or none. I found that a very odd thing for someone to say. Who in their right mind would feel comfortable sharing every detail of a family matter?! Yet you wanted to touch on the subject because it must have felt like avoiding the elephant in the room when you were waiting for the lab work. I, for one, totally understand where you were coming from!! I can’t imagine anyone handling that better. I don’t see how there is anything “trite” or “less serious” about it. Just because there was not further immediate cause for concern, thank God, does NOT lessen what this situation was. I can’t imagine people who could be upset by such a thing. Again- you don’t any of us anything, but your openness does help a lot of us feel like we’re not alone in this crazy business called parenting 🙂
Also, for the parents and children who are dealing with serious health matters. I am so sorry for your struggle and cannot even begin to imagine the stresses and worries you face on a daily basis. You have amazing reserves of strength and I know it’s because you have to for your little ones. I wish you the best of luck and happiest outcomes for your children, bless them.
Oh Julie! I’m sad that a few people have made you feel like you did something wrong in how you shared on your blog. Here’s the thing, we simply can’t be responsible for guarding and managing each other’s emotions…. they are all so fickle and ever changing. What hurts one might be exactly what others need. Personally, I felt grateful and cared for as a reader that you let us into this time. I found myself thinking about you and praying for you throughout the day last week.
I’m sad for the readers who are going through hard times and felt the way they did… but I’m even more sad that they made you feel even slightly responsible for their emotions. You aren’t. If a blog is making them emotionally react that strongly, then they probably have a lot of stuff that needs to be dealt with.
Proud of you for always being yourself, and grateful for the way you share with us!
SO well said. Thank you for summing up exactly what i was feeling. None of us is responsible for anyone’s feelings or emotions other than our own. Beautifully said 🙂
I too am a long time reader and a sometimes commenter and I’m so disheartened by that comment you received. It’s evident that while I’m sure this person meant no harm, the comment was out of annoyance that there were several days from your original post. They were likely curious and perhaps a bit nosey. Yes, there are people dealing with some pretty heavy things in their own lives but to try to judge what’s small or important in YOUR life is just wrong. I don’t need to know what was going on in your family to hear the fear in your words and THAT was enough for me to begin sending good thoughts and prayers your way. Yes, people have the right to make whatever comments they wish but i REALLY wish people would step outside themselves and think before they do.
So glad you have some time away with your beautiful family. Much love from an older reader in Rochester, NY
We’re obsessed with Honest Co diapers! They’re a bit more expensive than other brands, but gosh… they’re so much more absorbent and fit my baby so much better. We’re hooked! I laughed about the brow comment because brows are definitely all the rage. I wrote a post about brows and Benefit back in December after becoming obsessed with their Brow Bar, and apparently Benefit included my post in their national newsletter?! So bizarre!
Also, I know this has already been said, but for every 1 person who feels negatively about how you shared personal stuff this week, you have 100 more who appreciate your authenticity. Your blog has been successful for so long, and it’s because people come to this space to read about YOU. And you share your life with us so well. Thank you! And I’m so happy that Chase is okay. As a mama of two tiny kids myself, I could relate to your fear.
I just wanted to say two things.
1) You have the BEST Things I’m Loving Friday posts of any blog I read. I swear, I have like 20 screenshots in my phone of things to try or have tried (and love) based on your recommendations. Newest addition – Moroccan oil. A salon I used to go to used their products and I didn’t love the hair gel/milk type product but I think the oil would be similar to argan oil. I love the scent of the products so I think I’ll give it a shot! 🙂 Thank you!
2) I didn’t even read your response above about the comments you’ve gotten about your vagueness because I feel like this is YOUR blog and your life and we as readers have no right to tell you or express to you what we expect you to tell us or not tell us. In this day and age, it’s kind of a strange thing that we as readers have with you as bloggers. We feel like we know you completely when, in actuality, most of us are complete strangers to you. It has to be such a vulnerable feeling to share certain aspects of your life – especially concerning the wellbeing of your baby! You have every right to be as vague as you want to be or not share at all and I know that most of us appreciate what you did share and understand the “vagueness” centered around such a delicate and scary subject. I’m happy that it looks this scare is going to have a positive outcome!! I have three boys and I can tell you the worrying never goes away. My oldest just left to go to college across the country and I’ve been an emotional mess 🙂
Anyway, thanks for your transparency and sharing your life on this blog. Truly been one of my favorites for years. 🙂
Julie, you handled your response to that comment with so much dignity and class. As a long time reader, as most here are, I know I can speak for many when we LOVE hearing about all of your highs and lows because that’s the most genuine thing! I was reading a couple of those comments when you originally posted the good news about Chase, and all I wanted to say was “bye Felicia!!!” to those negative women. You keep being you because that is why everyone loves reading everything you post. Never stop blogging.
BYE FELICIA! I completely agree! It is up to you to share what you want, when you want, at the depth you want. Anyone who has an issue with that can just close their browser window. It’s that easy!
Your response made me so sad–this is YOUR space and you owe no one an apology. I hope the comfort you felt from readers who were praying and thinking of you drowns out the negativity from a few disgruntled grouches. The rude commenter should apologize for adding more stress to what was already an overwhelming experience for your sweet family.
I have to disagree, and I don’t think the commenter was rude. I very much shared her opinion, and think that, while I appreciated Julie’s heartfelt response, just because someone disagrees does not make them rude. I have a son the same age as Chase, and completely understand where Julie is coming from. I would have reacted the same way. However, I hope people can remember that what you’re calling “negativity” may be another individual reacting in a different way to the information Julie is sharing/not sharing. Just because someone disagrees, and voices that disagreement, does not mean they have to just leave, because Julie has long encouraged having a dialogue on this space. I hope that, in the future, you can see that your comments, while seemingly well-intentioned, can also come off as rude and negative. Let’s keep things civil, which means that we can have grown-up discussions here, k?
Hi Julie! I think that what you want to say or dont want to say on your blog is up to you. You can be vague or open…its your space! I think people who comment things like this are jealous or have too much time to spare. I hope those comments didnt get you down! <3
This week I'm loving Brown rice spaghetti because i havent been able to eat good old fashioned spaghetti in months!
Julie. This is YOUR blog. Your job is to enjoy your family and PROTECT your loved ones. It is a wonderful thing that you try and protect and support your readers. But you are Chase’s mother. Not your reader’s mothers. At the end of the day you can’t be responsible for everyone’s feelings and and their daily life concerns. You are doing a great job. Write on girl!
Reading your response to the comment broke my heart.. You should be able to share what ever and how ever much you want to on here without being judged or criticized, or left feeling like what you’re going through is small in comparison to others. You have so many people on your side, and I’m so glad to hear the good news about your baby!
Holly, I completely agree with you! So happy for you and your family that the news this week was good news.
I completely agree, Holly. This is your blog, you choose what to share and as a parent, nothing is frightening than learning there may be a medical issue with your child – even if it seems minor in comparison to someone else. You just keep doing what you you’re doing! So glad to hear everything is OK with Chase!
I agree, perfectly said, Holly. I am sure the added stress of worrying about what to share or not to share, or how your readers will react is the last thing you and your family need. This is your space, we’re all just visitors 🙂 You do such an excellent job week after week! Thank you!
I so agree! As a long time reader and in the very same phase of life as you (I have two little boys around the same age as Chase!), I feel so grateful you share with us because it makes me feel less alone in my mommy/life struggles. I so understand your fear this week and am SO HAPPY some of that fear has been lightened! Thank you for opening your life up to us!!!
I find this a truly disturbing trend that readers feel like they are entitled to ‘full transparency’, just because they are ‘long time blog readers’ and feel entitled to ‘know everything’ (because ‘your blog is a business and we support you, basically’). What the heck? Julie, you did nothing wrong with deciding what you want to share, where your boundaries of sharing were and are. Obviously, it was deeply affecting you, but you also did not want the whole world to chime in on the details. I think most people can respect this boundary; they might be worried for you but also trust you that you can handle things. Life is not ‘all or nothing’, and if readers cannot handle it, maybe you can live without THOSE readers 😉
I think a good rule of thumb to consider is if you were in a traditional work environment, would you make an announcement to all of your colleagues regarding your son’s need for further medical testing? No, of course not – it would be far too premature and you’d just share your worries with a few close colleagues who you have personal relationships with. Maybe that same approach would here?
You handled the comments so well and it’s truly admirable. I, honestly, don’t know if I would have put that much effort and care into a response..as bad as that sounds! This is your space and if you didn’t want to share all of the details, that is completely okay. For me, I completely understand that when a negative situation comes up that is upsetting, sharing all of the details (especially on the internet) may not be what you want to do RIGHT when everything is happening. I appreciate you sharing any details you give, which in the end, is why we all are here and love your blog. 🙂
I honestly cannot believe anyone would feel this way when reading a blog. I believe it is a reflection on themselves and not you. You can post whatever you want- I love reading your blog because you post real life highs and lows, things that we are all going thru. Everyone has their own road with different struggles/battles and we all deal with things differently. It’s nice to know we aren’t alone in this crazy journey. So continue to post what you feel is appropriate. And honestly I thought about chase all weekend, hoping for good results. You do you boo, and don’t worry about the haters. For every negative nancy you have 5 people cheering for you!
Julie,
Wow. If I didn’t love you and want to move to NC to be friends with you I certainly do now! You handled your response with such grace, class and elegance that I only hope to obtain. You are truly an inspiring to me! Especially, as a mom to be (I’m 37 weeks 2 days)! I hope I posses the motherly love you have for Chase for my daughter.
Personally, I love how you share so much of your life. All the time we see all these happy go lucky couples and families on social media that it makes me feel like sometimes my family is the only one that struggles. You and your family are so real and relate-able that I can’t help but smile (now that I know Chase is going to be fine)!
There is a fine line with sharing so much of yourself on the internet, but just know that no matter how small a health concern may be there were so many blog readers praying/hoping Chase and your family would be okay. Anything could have happen and you showed your readers just how vulnerable and real you really are.
Have fun this weekend in WV with the family!
Ho Julie, I just wanted to say that there is nothing at all wrong with saying, hey I’m going through a tough time, prayers are appreciated. Everyone has rough periods and we, as readers, want to support you and do care. So no shame at all on venting your concerns regarding what is going on. That’s what friends, even those you have not met, are there for.
I so agree ladies!! I personally continuously sent positive vibes and thoughts out the whole week and couldn’t wait to hear about Chase but I never once thought I needed to be privy to what exactly was going on! This is YOUR space!!! Please don’t change!!!! Let’s all concentrate on the fact that you have so many blog readers that genuinely care about you and your family. How beautiful that you have been able to develop relationships with readers in such a broad spectrum when so many struggle to have genuine relationships with their everyday peers!
Julie, let me tell you what my thought was when I read your “vague” blog. Immediately I thought maybe one of your parents had cancer or something like that and you just needed the extra prayers. When I saw you updated that Chase was involved, my heart sank for you because I know he’s everything to you and Ryan. I’m not a parent but I can empathize that anything from the most serious of diseases to something as simple as your child getting their feelings hurt can break a mama’s heart into pieces. Are there people going through “more serious” issues? ALWAYS. Someone ALWAYS has it worse than you do…that does NOT lessen what you are going through and the worry and million scenarios that go through your head as you wait to get the all clear. It’s human nature and it doesn’t diminish our worse fears during that time.
This is YOUR BLOG and you share what you want, when you want and be however vague or specific as you feel comfortable being in that moment. You turned to your readers, no…friends, in this journey of life because you needed emotional support and you got it…well, mostly. Don’t let the few comments from people who are trying to impose their ways of how you should run your blog change how you approach your space here, no matter how passively aggressive it was worded. You are the sweetest and I was glad you would share when things weren’t going so well. I said a prayer that whatever you were facing and whomever was facing it would be okay. We can all use more good vibes and I’m glad your lil nugget is okay!! 🙂
(Didn’t mean to go all caps on a few things but rolling my eyes at my screen whilst reading wouldn’t have been conveyed! HA!)
I just want to chime in that you shouldn’t feel like you did anything wrong. You sharing what’s going on in YOUR life with YOUR son (when you didn’t even have to in such a public space) is not making any kind of statement or stating any kind of opinion about children who do unfortunately have serious health issues. Just because the outcome happened to be positive doesn’t change that, and it says a lot (not in a positive light) about anyone who would do anything other than cheer you and your family on after hearing that you have good news.
As an English/Journalism college major, I’ve heard a lot about transparency and when it’s appropriate to be more open than others. I personally think you struck the perfect balance in this situation. I appreciate you being vulnerable and sharing the lows with us as your readers. But I respect that you don’t want to share all of the details – especially at a time when you didn’t know for sure that Chase would be okay.
That said, I know that others will not have the same reaction as me, and I can see how you don’t want to bring him into this and expose yourself to that sort of vulnerability. I respect that too, I just hope that you continue to share everything that you feel is right without fear of backlash or disapproval. You do you.
I think your response to the criticism was wonderful, but I think it’s truly up to you what you share and what you don’t share. As a biologist, I know that something as seemingly simple as blood work can potentially show very serious disease. I don’t think you were in any way making light of what other parents go through. It’s thoughtful of you to take feedback so seriously, but ultimately if it eases your mind and feels genuine to share, then that’s what you should do.
I am so glad to hear of the good news of your little one! At no point in time should you ever feel like you are upsetting readers due to anything you post on your blog. This is your blog. You share what you want to share and don’t share what you don’t want to share. That is completely up to you. There will always be people to criticize everything you do. Just know, it is their choice to read your blog. If they don’t like what they read, then they don’t have to read it. 🙂
I will be a new mom in December and I can’t imagine what you have been going through. I appreciate everything you have shared about your pregnancy, delivery, and the day to day life with a young one, your pup, and your friends/family. I absolutely love reading your blog and it is the first thing I do every morning. So again, thank you for sharing your life with us. Enjoy your weekend!
You’re probably one of the few bloggers who take constructive criticism to heart instead of getting defensive. I appreciate your heartfelt response. You’re a good person and I’m glad your son is ok
I agree with many of the comments left already but want to reiterate, that this is YOUR blog and what you decide to share is up to you. One of the biggest things I’ve learned as a mom to a 1.5 year old is that everyone fights their own battles. Just because I think something is a big deal or stressful doesn’t mean that another mom would feel the same way or vice versa. I find that your genuine personality is something that keeps me coming back over and over to your blog. You keep things real about things that you both love and dislike about motherhood and never sugar coat your struggles with sleep, eating, etc. That is so refreshing in a world of social media highlight reels. Please don’t ever change that!
Hi Julie,
While I can see where this person is coming from (I too was frustrated but only because I always want the deets!), I absolutely do NOT agree that you should not be sharing the most important things in your life. Honestly, I think many of us are very invested in Chase at this point. He is almost like an adorable favorite storybook character and we love him! I would be very sad not to hear updates on his health and growing up.
I believe it is a very important message to put out there that no matter what someone is going through, it’s hard for them. It never helps to say it could be worse or that someone else is going through something worse because that does not make your feelings any less. And that holds true for you, and it’s important to let people know that what’s hard for you is hard for you and that has nothing at all to do with anyone else and what might be hard for them. You have the right to put it out there and ask for support and just share it (because sometimes that helps) and many, many of us love to hear it, I promise!
I’m not a frequent commenter here on your blog, but I’ve been reading since you got engaged and I have always LOVED this blog — I just needed to pop in and drop my two cents.
You handled this entire situation with dignity and grace. Child health scares are just that– scary! I am blown away by the comment that your vagueness somehow made things seem less serious. First of all, it is your prerogative to share or not share any information about your life (especially medical information, which is very private– there are tons of laws such as HIPAA protecting who can share what about your medical information!) and secondly, I don’t think it is anyone’s place as a reader to judge how valid the “severity” of someone’s concerns are.
You are a mom, and your worries (and joys!) about your baby are 100% valid, no matter what they are about! For someone else to try and quantify your feelings against “what some other parents might be going through” seems extremely unfair — say Chase got chickenpox; you would be well within your rights to be sad about it/sad for him, and it would be completely in appropriate for someone to come in and say “Well that’s not so bad! Some other kids have cancer!” Someone else’s trauma/sadness/illness/worry does not somehow negate your own. You were worried (and rightly so-medical stuff is scary!) and you wanted to let your readers know why you were a little absent. Honestly, to me the reason for that worry doesn’t matter– you are within your rights to feel it no matter what.
Part of what brings me back to this blog day after day is your willingness to share the real and sometimes unglamorous parts of your life. However, as a reader it is my job to understand that what you share is up to you!! I (and every other stranger on the internet) have no right to more information about any aspect of your life, and no way to lay claim or dictate how you share it.
Sorry this got so long! You are such a delightful human being and these comments from readers (no matter how thoughtfully put) seem extremely invasive and shaming. You shared a reasonable amount of information (and there is no “right” amount of information for you to have shared/not shared!) and shouldn’t feel bad about that.
I agree with everyone on here. It is ridiculous that people are making you feel bad about how you chose to handle your scare with Chase. It is none of their business, and if they don’t like it, they can stop reading. It is unreal how entitled some people feel.
Dearest Julie,
I felt that you were completely authentic with the way you handled things. You shared with us what you were ready to share. That is real. However you decide to move forward with what you share I support you, but know that there is more of us who were praying for you than judging you.
I just want to say…. People log on to read your blog because we love what YOU are going to say, highs and lows. There will be 98% of people who will encourage, cheer you on, be there for you, pray for you and then theres the 2% that will complain and unfortunately… The 2% is what we remember, its what sticks. I think i speak for the majority when i say… Post whatever is going on in your life, its natural to have others disagree and ive had instances where i stop reading other blogs because it wasnt things i was interested in reading anymore- and thats ok!
Anyways, im SO GLAD that sweet Chase is ok!!!!! And never doubt that you have a community of people that love the PBF family and wish you all the health and happiness!
Hi Julie. I don’t normally comment, but I feel compelled to today. I thoroughly enjoy your blog, and what I enjoy most about it is the fact that you share your personal life, recipes, and fitness tips. It’s perfect mix in my opinion. I’ve been an avid reader since 2011, and your blog has been the only one that I’ve stuck with this long. I usually go through phases with blogs and that has never happened with yours. I believe the reason for this is because of the broad range of topics that you cover, which includes your personal life. Your blog feels real to me because you post how you’re feeling and what you’re going through at the time, even when you can’t provide all the details. I don’t think it’s fair for people to criticize how you handle certain issues on the blog. This is your space, and you should manage it in a way that feels right to you. For every person who wasn’t happy with your vague post last week, there was at least one person (me) who felt more connected to you, even though I don’t know you. I just wanted to tell you to keep being you and posting what you feel is right because by doing that, you’re keeping the right readers coming back for more.
That’s ridiculous! As a long time reader, I appreciate the fact that you do address the highs and lows. You don’t owe us any personal details that you don’t feel comfortable sharing. And who are we to judge what is considered “big” or not? Anything with you, your family, or child is huge! Ps- I am currently pregnant with my first child and have LOVED going back and reading all your old pregnancy posts! It’s so fun to read them again, but this time from a different point of view!!!