Things to Remember on My Wedding Day

This post is a long one full of wedding rambles, so let’s breeze through lunch!

Lunch today was an apple and Muenster cheese quesadilla, served on a whole-wheat tortilla and warmed up in the microwave in the breakroom at my work.

Wednesday Lunch

On the side I enjoyed a freshly-sliced green pepper for some added nutrients.

Green Peppa

Yay for green!

On to the wedding talk…

Warning: Wedding talk may dominate the blog for the next 10 days. :D

Things I Want to Remember on My Wedding Day

Last night as Ryan and I were driving to game night at my friend Laurel’s apartment, I turned to him and told him about a mini revelation I had on my run on Tuesday morning.

I feel like I’ve been so wrapped up in the wedding and all of the little details like the menus, programs and bridesmaid gifts that I was almost overlooking the whole point of the wedding… Our marriage!

October 30... Be There!

It seems like there are so many last-minute details that come along with planning a wedding that it’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of the big day. My mini revelation made me realize how important it is for me to remember why we’re having a wedding.

This thought really helped me put things into perspective. No matter what happens on our wedding day, it will be perfect because of the reason for the day.

Ever since we got engaged, I told Ryan that the part of our wedding day I am most looking forward is our ceremony and our vows.

Of course I cannot wait to see my friends and family and party the night away, but thinking about holding Ryan’s hands and committing ourselves to each other forever deeply moves me. Ryan and I have put a lot of effort into making our ceremony our own and I cannot wait to see our work come to fruition and hear our pastor read the loving words we’ve selected aloud.

Since I am a planner and a list-maker my nature, I decided to make a list of moments I really want to focus on during our wedding day:

  • Getting ready with my bridesmaids: Since many of my best friends live hundreds of miles away, I cannot wait to spend quality time with my friends who have made such a deep impact on my heart.

Friends Since Elementary School

Laurel, My Best Friend and College Roommate

  • Putting my dress on with my mom: One of my favorite things about my wedding dress is how much I think it looks like a modern-day version of my mother’s dress. My mom has been with me every step of the way during the whole wedding-planning process (and my life!), and I know watching her zip me in will be an emotional and moving moment.

Mama & Me

  • Walking down the aisle with my dad: I think my dad may be the person who is most excited for our wedding, but he is also the person I think will be the most emotional. I want to be sure to treasure the walk down the aisle with him.

Daddy's Girl

  • Seeing Ryan for the first time: I get goosebumps just typing this!
  • Saying our vows: I know marriage sounds so romantic, but I am also looking at our marriage as a decision and a commitment. I want to truly feel the vows I say and recognize their importance and realize how lucky I am to be committing myself to such an amazing man.
  • Celebrating with Ryan’s family: I feel very lucky to be marrying into such a warm and welcoming family and am excited to celebrate the merging of two groups of people I love very much.
  • Listening to my sister’s speech as maid of honor: I know whatever my sister says will be perfect. She has a way of conveying such sincerity and loving emotion whenever she speaks and I cannot wait to hear her toast.

Sista, Sista

  • Listening to the toasts from Ryan’s best men: Ryan has two wonderful best men with totally different personalities and I cannot wait to hear what they have to say!

One of Ryan's Best Men (Daniel, His Cousin & College Roommate)

  • My first dance with my dad: Grab a Kleenex!
  • Dancing and partying with friends: Ryan and I are so lucky to have so many of our friends coming in from out of town to celebrate our big day. I know our friends will be the life of our wedding and I cannot wait to party it up with friends from elementary school, high school and college.

Fun Friends!

  • Visiting with family: I cannot wait to catch up with family I haven’t seen in a long time and give BIG hugs to my grandma, aunts and uncles!

I know this post was beyond wordy, but I wanted to get all of my thoughts down so I can really concentrate on taking it all in on the big day. I also know that in all my words I am surely leaving something important out!

And that’s where you come in…

I would LOVE input and advice from you guys about moments I should be sure to take time to cherish on our wedding day.

Feel free to share memories from your wedding or weddings you’ve attended that particularly moved you.

Comments

  1. says

    This has got to be one of my favorite post from you, it seriously made me emotional. Just like you, I want to look forward to these moments too.

    I am such a sucker, but I there’s a wedding blog that I like to look at http://www.jackiewonders.com because I feel like her picures captures those moments you described. I guess most wedding photos do! but it takes someone with talent/gifts to convey that in a photo :)

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  2. Rebecca says

    Great advice – to remeber what your wedding is actually about! I’m in the planning process for my wedding 9.10.11 and love your wedding post! thanks! P.S. I’m reading the comments hoping for advice :)

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    • Kaella says

      I’m just re-reading this amazing post and saw this comment. I’m also getting married 9-10-11! I just wanted to say I hope your plans are coming along great…and I know both our days are going to be amazing :)

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        • Kaella says

          I’m getting married at a museum in Lethbridge, Alberta (Canada) where my fiance and I both live. I’m from Vancouver, British Columbia, but I figured it was probably easier to plan in the place we’re getting married :) How about you? 7 months!! YAY!!

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  3. Natalie says

    Sorry to say, I barely remember my day at all. From the moment I walked down the aisle, everything was a blur. I didn’t even see my violinist, the ceremony flowers. I never ate my dinner. There was only 20 people at my wedding and I managed to miss some of the important pictures. I did enjoy getting ready with my girls though. Enjoy being the bride, the center of attention, and make sure that you get tons of pictures and that you have a list of pictures you absolutely have to have, and give it to the photographer. Ask your family to take pictures on their own cameras too. So, when you look back and can barely remember the day, you’ll have photo documentation!

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  4. Caroline says

    I didn’t read through all the comments, but one piece of advice that was given to me for our wedding day, and is part of the Jewish traditions, is to take 10-15 minutes after the ceremony, just the 2 of you, to really take in what just happened and the festivities that are about to happen. Also, BE SURE TO EAT!!! My makeup artist wouldn’t start until I ate my lunch. If you aren’t eating dinner when everyone else is at cocktail hour (do pictures first, get married, eat while everyone does their cocktails, then mingle during their dinner), you’ll thank me, only because you won’t have a moment to eat otherwise.

    I really like your blog and glad I came across it. Great way to brighten the day.

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  5. says

    Wow this brought a tear to my eye! But I have to admit that it is mostly because I didn’t get so many of those special moments on my wedding day. (And over four years later I still haven’t received my wedding video from my husband’s uncle!)

    What I did get was an amazing husband whom I love very dearly. Truly cherish every moment. It goes by so quickly!

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  6. Christine says

    Not married, but there is a moment I find particularly special.

    The moment before you are announced at your reception. Your wedding party will have already been presented and you and Ryan will be alone for a brief moment before being introduced as Mr. and Mrs.!

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  7. says

    Awwww….this makes me so excited for MY wedding day, and I’m only 20!!! So many great things to look forward to!!

    My sis-in-law came to visit me this weekend and we talked about her wedding (she and my brother got married in July). She said that she regrets barely hanging out with him at all during the reception…they were dancing the night away with family members and talking to everyone, so she said she wished she’d made an effort to connect with him, as well as with everyone else!!

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  8. says

    Take a moment just the two of you. There will be lots of friends and family to talk to and hang with, but remember this day is for YOU and HIM. I will never forget after the ceremony and all the pictures at the church we were standing outside the reception waiting to be announced and were alone for the first time since our vows. We stalled a bit to cherish that moment before all the hustle and bustle of the reception.

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  9. says

    Oh my gosh! You’re making me so wedding excited/happy seriously! I don’t have much advice, don’t get sloppy before the wedding (nothing like a 16 candles incident), enjoy yourself don’t worry about the reception or anything like that! Have others worry for you! AND so enjoy time on the dance floor! People seeing the Bride and Groom having fun, always makes them join in!

    AND Yes, remember that it is a marriage, not just a wedding, I think many people forget that now days and I think we need to remember that!

    PS I love you in your mothers wedding dress! I actually plan to wear my mothers, which was also my grandmothers! :)

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  10. carlee says

    Wow! I loved this post. I actually thought about that a few days ago about your wedding! Like what the whole point of it was. and you really have a great family coming together! Great things to remember I think you hit the important stuff dead on!
    I soooooo excited!

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  11. Angela says

    I just got married on Sept. 4th so I know how stressed, excited and anxious you must be right now!!! The thing that so many people told me before I got married is that I’d be so busy talking to people that I wouldn’t be able to eat.. drink… or party! SO I made it a point to eat… drink… and be merry! After the wedding I had so many people tell me they could tell how happy and how much fun my husband and I were having at our wedding. The day is about you two and NO one else. So cherish every moment because the day flies by! Congrats and good luck! Love your blog:)!

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  12. says

    some others have already said some of this but take mental snapshots. eat. go for a run in the morning if it’ll help you relax (just be careful- no freak accidents on your wedding day!), or skip a day if you’re rushed (since i don’t know the time of your ceremony). we got married at 4:30 so i had a leisurely day. and definitely don’t forget the reason for the day… your MARRIAGE! so happy for you!

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  13. says

    So…I have been married for 5 short months, and I am a Wedding Planner…What I can tell you is, do not fret. Do not stress, do not stay up thinking if things will be just right, because no matter what, they will be! Because it is YOUR day (And Ryan’s, FYI My hubby is named Ryan, good choice!)

    Just soak in each and every moment as much as you can, because whether you like it or not, the day flies by, and feels like an ooey gooey romantic whirlwind!

    Also, do what YOU want to do that day. Whether it is a certain something for breakfast, taking pics somewhere spur of the moment, talking less, dancing more, do it! I danced the night away at our Wedding with my handsome hubby and don’t regret it a second :)

    And, lastly, when you can throughout the day, stop, look around…and breathe it all in! I stopped quite a few times that day and just took beautiful mental pictures that will forever be held in my heart <3

    I would normally say, I HOPE your day is perfect, but I know it WILL be. Best wishes to you and your (almost) husband! You will be a beautiful Bride :)

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  14. says

    I think you’ve got it right!

    Getting ready with your girls is one of the best parts!

    One piece of advice. I wouldn’t go from table to table. I would just visit some of your older relatives who you might not see on the dance floor. Use the cocktail hour for mingling and then spend the rest of the night having fun!! If you are constantly at each table (and posing for everyone’s camera) you will miss the fun! It goes so fast, so give those beautiful shoes a workout.

    Oh and don’t start with the champagne too early. :)

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  15. says

    Excellent points! It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the other things that are involved in a wedding and forget about the main purpose. I’m excited for you and your wedding…and for all the wedding details over the next 10 days! :)

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  16. says

    I love that you made a list, that is great!! It is so easy to get wrapped up in the hoop-la! Good for you and I’m sure it will be a perfectly magical day for the both of you! :)

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  17. says

    YES!!! I am so happy that you realize these things because I swear, the day goes by faster than you will ever imagine. Another thing to try to remember is to look at Ryan’s face whenever he first sees you. OMG this is truly the most incredible moment you will ever have. I can’t even explain how magical this moment is so remember to capture it. :)

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  18. says

    Awww, this post brings back so many memories! I totally agree with you on everything you wrote…especially grabbing the kleenex for the dance with Dad. That was a killer!
    If I could offer one piece of advice: Make sure you and Ryan take just 10 minutes to separate yourselves from the festivities, sit back, and just look at what’s around you. Jay and I did this, and it was honestly one of the best moments of the night. Just watching all our friends and family, who were there to celebrate US…it was honestly the most magical moment I’ve ever experienced, not to mention super emotional. Just remember…the day is going to FLY by, so take in every.single.moment.
    I am so beyond excited for you!!! :-D

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  19. Melissa (MelissaLikesToEat) says

    I always tell brides to take a moment during the reception to take a look around and absorb everything around you. It goes so fast and you want to see all your hard work and remember every detail. :)

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  20. says

    Julie-I’m getting so excited for you! I got married April 2009 and it was perfect. I was such a stressed bride. I wasn’t Bridezilla, I just harbored a lot of my own stress. I really wanted all of the stress to fade away and just be able to enjoy my day. I joked that I didn’t care if my dress caught on fire, I was bound and determined to have a wonderful, stress-free day…and it was just that! My husband and I had the best time. We danced and laughed with friends and family all night long. I still can’t get over how perfect everything seemed to come together. As we were leaving the wedding, my husband and I agreed that it was such a great day, but we were soooooo glad it was over! :) I’ll be thinking of you over these next few days. Best wishes!

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  21. says

    On a sentimental note – just absorb every moment you can on your day, but also know you won’t be part of everything. I know I made an effort to thank everyone who came for coming, but there were still people I missed. Also – there will be unexpected moments that pop up that will make your day extra memorable that you won’t expect, so just love it all! I know on my day, my groom surprised me with a song (vocal + guitar) he wrote and sang/ played for me as his wedding gift to me. My dad did a little speech, which I wasn’t entirely expecting – it was supposed to be more of a “thank you for coming” but ended up being so sentimental, talking about our new marriage, his marriage with my mom, our families combining, etc…. lovely! Then there was the impromptu dance three groomsmen put together with N’Sync’s “Bye Bye Bye” — LOL I still laugh when I see the pictures. :)

    To continue my wordiness (sorry!) on a less sentimental note, I’m sure you’re already planning on doing this, but just make sure you have someone else who will be the person everyone else can come to with questions. You don’t need to hear questions about the guest who just became vegan two days ago and wants a new entree, or the alcohol issue, or whatever. Let someone else take care of EVERYTHING because NOTHING will matter as much as you two absorbing your day together. (Also, I wouldn’t have the go to person be an immediate fam member — this is a huge day for them, too, and you don’t want them distracted/ bothered, either!)

    You are going to be such a beautiful bride, can’t wait to hear and see all about the wedding! xo!

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  22. Kaella says

    I am so happy and excited for you! I’m glad you mentioned something about your mom…because I feel like sometimes (with the walk/dance with your day) mom’s can feel a bit left out. I’m not married…but when I do commit to someone one day, I hope all of these things you listed, are some of my strongest memories as well. Will be thinking of you all next week… as a reader, I’ve followed your journey (engagement, shower, stagette etc) and I just feel as excited for you as I would one of my girlfriends. Ryan and you are so lucky to have each other…. enjoy the moments :)

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  23. says

    Julie, this post is amazing! I think what you’re writing is so important and so true. Cherish EVERY moment and really soak it in. You’ve gotten the best advice. I’m so happy for you!

    Seeing you so excited and focused on the joy of the future excites me too! I’m still in college but I can’t wait for the day when my boyfriend and I can reach that stage of our life together!

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  24. Jessica says

    Ok I didn’t read all of your comments so forgive me if I repeat things.
    A few pointers/comments from my wedding day experience:
    Look at Ryan you’re whole way down the aisle (but don’t forget to look good and cheese it up!-TONS of people are taking your picture), Take it all in-during our first dance, we would glance around at the room and our families and we kept saying over and over “holy crap, this is OUR wedding, all 300 (yikes!) people are here for US, to celebrate with US!” If you can see the reception room before everyone gets in there, do it-it’s crazy to see all of your hard work put together, sitting there looking beautiful! Make sure you dance and enjoy yourself! You will not be able to eat as much as you want. It will take you 25 minutes to walk from one side of the room to the other because everyone wants to say hi, tell you that you look beautiful, and ask where are you going for your honeymoon? You won’t talk to everyone in the room. You will have a HUSBAND-remember how lucky you are to have someone so great to spend the rest of your life with! Something WILL go wrong-who cares? If you’re there and Ryan is there and you are Mr & Mrs…who cares if the wrong cake topper gets delivered? But at the end of the day…just enjoy, it is the longest day ever from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed, but it will be the quickest damn day of your life and you’ll wish it could last forever.
    Whew that was kind of long-congrats & ENJOY :)

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  25. Lyndsay says

    I have really enjoyed reading your blog the past few months; it always puts a smile on my face! Today’s post was no different – I got engaged a few months ago and this post (and all the comments) have been really awesome to read. It’s great to hear your heartfelt sentiments about this big day and I wish you and Ryan all the best!!

    P.S. Can’t wait to see pictures!

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  26. says

    Hi :) Not sure I’ve ever commented before but I had to on this one! I just got married this summer and one of the best things I did was to make time during the night to just walk away with my new husband for a few minutes to look each other in the eye, kiss and say “We’re married”! Make it a point to find each other and just be present in between all the celebrating with friends and family. It worked for us!

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  27. Jessica says

    what i love so much about this post is that it reminds me of a journal entry i once made, that just makes you stop and think how amazing your life is at the moment and how blessed you are.
    congrats on your upcoming big day and i hope it is as memorable as you hope. you deserve it!

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  28. Orla says

    I got married in may, and as hard as I tried to slow down and enjoy the day, it was over before I knew it! I’m kind of jealous you, because it really was the greatest day of my life and I’d do *anything* to relive it again!

    People seem to have covered off all the good advice but here’s my one regret: we didn’t hire a videographer. The day was such a blur that I really wish I had a video of the ceremony now. On the day I was so nervous about forgetting my vows that I barely remember anything that he or any of our speakers said about us!! And I cried all the way up the aisle and look like a total doof in all those photos, so hold it together if you can!

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  29. Marie-Sophie says

    I got all teary reading your post and then teary-eyed AGAIn when reading all the comments ;-)

    Such a weird but very wonderful feeling to see someone you kind of follow on a regular basis take such a big step in life on the other side of the world – gives me goosebumps just thinking about it and I am just really excited for the two of you!!

    I had two marriages of very close friends this year and I must say although both were wonderful and very unique, one couple tried to be all “mature” and do and say things that they thought people were expecting from them … which wasn’t bad or anything but I felt that the other couple’s wedding was a lot more sincere.
    It was just THEM, it was their day, everything they had planned, everything they did on that day had its unique stamp (without them trying too hard!); the most beautiful moments when you would look at them, having lots of little moments together, soaking things in throughout the WHOLE day!!

    So yeah, it may sound a bit weird but just have YOUR special day, soak it all in, don’t think “we should do this now” or “people expect us to do this” – no, everyone just loves to be part of your day and seeing the two of you happy is the biggest thing for everyone :-)

    OH – and enjoy the moments BEFORE your wedding day … just as great!

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  30. Nicole says

    Hi Julie,
    First of all, I love your blog! A must read for me every day!

    One thing that my husband and I did on our wedding day (that I am extremely glad we did); we walked by every table during our reception and spoke with all the guests. We did this during dinner, I didn’t care if my food was cold by the time I got back to the head table! It allowed us to say hello to everyone that graced us with their presence on the best day of our lives! I knew the night would be a huge blur and I wouldn’t have enough time to speak with everyone there so this allowed us the chance to do that. I felt the reception line when we were greeting the guests as they came into the banquet hall was too rushed.

    We also made sure once the party and dancing began, that we moved from group to group, that way we got to dance with EVERYONE! Then at the end of the evening, my husband and I stood up on chairs while the DJ played our favourite song and we sang at the top of our lungs while our family and friends danced around us; a moment we will never forget. The day will be over before you know it, make sure you take in as much as you can; stop, look around and absorb as much as you can!

    July 18 was our first anniversary, and it’s still hard to believe after all the planning and stress leading up to the wedding and it’s all over in a flash! I would do it all over again (of course with the same guy) ;). I hope your day is everything you hope it will be! Congratulations!!

    Cheers,

    Nicole
    -from Canada

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  31. Vanessa says

    How cute!
    You hit the nail on the head when you said no matter what the day will be perfect because of the reason you’re getting married. Everything can go wrong but it will be perfect
    Just remember that and you’ve got it!

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  32. BrendaBettina says

    My wedding is 6days away!! This post is so great to re-read before my big day, it had really helped to put things in perspective and has made me even more excited :) Yah!!

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  33. Alexandra says

    I’m getting married in less than two weeks, and I’ve been looking for inspiration about how to make our wedding more about our marriage than our wedding day. I’ve gotten so sick of pinterest and the wedding shows while planning my wedding because for me, this day is so much more than all the material things. People keep asking me if I’m nervous or freaking out because the day is getting so close. I can honestly say that I am not! I couldn’t be happier to finally be my best friend’s wife and to celebrate our love with our family and friends. Thank you for being one of the few places that I could find that spirit and inspiration!

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